The Children A Reflection Of The Fathers?

CHILDREN CAN A REFLECTION OF THE PARENTS?

One of the most complex tasks facing parents is the education of children. This is something new and different to anything known, a task for which they have no training and has nothing to do with being children. This last point is very important because many parents are "naturally" drawn to the education of their children, a way known to them, ie, impose the same actions they have taken place in education or, conversely, for their children avoid situations that they feel they have lived or tax dramatically.

The excess of affection with their children may be the manifestation of a revival and a reproduction of narcissism of parents, abandoned long ago. This situation is so common, and so little beneficial in the future can cause disorders that prevent man perform independently, his life.

The hiperestimación that has been staged in the filial relationship, where the child attribute all perfections (attribution, in many cases, far removed from reality) makes parents blind to the defects that the child has. Defects that are neither bad nor good, are qualities of human puppy's development has to become a man or a woman, similar but different from all other men and women.

There is also a tendency in some parents to deny or ignore the child all the cultural achievements, attributing them, as parents, small achievements are gaining in reality. We hear phrases like: My child is the smartest, My son is the best play or My Little does everything well. The "I" repeated insistently is not nothing but a clear manifestation of narcissism, where "I" is the most significant achievements of the child. That is, the child is like an extension of the parents that meet those aspirations of childhood. Thus, in many cases, defects found in children with a parental failure, failure as a big disappointment felt by them. This clouds the eyes of parents, due to the narcissistic wound that is generated. In these cases, it may happen that the parent or parents are away for the education of children through the responsible educators, friends, other people in general, radically excluded from any liability, because, if responsible, can see the errors of their children, their own mistakes, their own shortcomings, that is, glimpses of his own imperfection, innate characteristic of human beings, ie their quality of mortals.

Is attributed, in all cases, children an easier life than the parents, which is easy to observe from the knowledge and adult development. They are tools which the child knows nothing about the subject and therefore no access to such knowledge and development can not be put in action. That is, being an adult has its complexities but also adult children have skills unknown to addressing your life.

Despite the absence of concerns, such as illness, death, renunciation, the pleasure and the limitation of one's will by the laws of nature or society itself, the child does not live outside these complexities are many situations that are presented as new and you have to learn to drive.

In the new reality that is imposed on the child constantly, both externally and internally, we add the imposition of the parents to make themselves unfulfilled desires, for example, the requirement to become a great man, the hero that the father did not become or, in the case of women, to get a man to his life that resembles a prince (desires both of every man and woman). The only thing that is pursued with such an attitude of parents is to be, somehow, in the immortal achievements of their children, but to what extent this situation with children is nothing but a selfish attitude? Selfishness where the important thing is not to allow and provide an education to the children that makes them independent and enable their development beyond the existence of their parents, but a narcissistic attitude that increases the false estimate of the self of the parents, thus denying their own mortality and their children into believing they are right, a belief that clearly harms the evolution and development of the child, sooner or later be related to a restrictive society, civilization.

The love of parents, so moving at times but so childish, basically, is but a resurrection of the narcissism of the parents, which shows, selfishly, in love as on children.

Once the child is born, the parents' role is to provide food and care, necessary for growth, which means a tailored education, not the half of the parents. Once satisfied the basic needs of children, are to be delivered to the world, to make their own way.